p-word, g-word, b-word=d-word

These are the words that make me miserable. You're smart enough to guess what the letters stand for.

dissapointments

No joke, boys piss me off. I feel like i get all rattled up on aim because none of this shiat happens in person.
First of all read this conversation:
me : sooo how are u?
douche bag: im alrite
me: well idk how i am untill summer break
douche bag: im liek teughaeug
me: huh?
douche bag: idk alot of up n downs
me: ohhhmmm like wat
douche bag: eh stuff
me: ok..
douche bag: yeah too much to talk about
me: hahaa
douche bag: still gotta get on this paper
me: okdo your paper then
douche bag: haha. ok
me: haha im not
me: lol

FUCK OFF. seriously, holy moly...you imed me and the you tell me you have a lot of ups and downs and then you say that you have to write this paper. I know I'm blowing this out of proportion but first of all: why do you think that I care how you are..and secondly: why do you tell me that you have problems and then say that you are too busy to tell me about them.
I BLOCKED HIM finally, or else i will have to continue to ERASE him from my buddy list eveytime he says something STUPID. omg, i seriously hate him.

OK....PART 2 of my sadness.
J: i hear ur grup is the biggest group of gossipers
me: are you serious,hmmm that sad
J: yeah ..
me: hahaa, wow
J: i heard BIGGEST
J: and all i thought of was U AND STEPHANIE
J: OLOLOLS CAUSE U GUYS ALWAY SGOSSIP TO EACH OTHER
J: HAHAHAHA
me: well we just tell each other wat we hear and yatta yatta
me: but trust, every girl group does it
me: its not like we r soo bad
J: yeah but ive heard SPECIFICALLY PAULINES AND STEPHANIES GROUP
me: hmmm, i guesss. that sucks-_-
me: i never knew i would be labeled gossip queen

Honestly, I was soooo sad wen my friend said this to me. Sorry if I tell everything to my best friends and people who ask me stuf...but who knew that I would be labeled a gossip queen. Goodness, im so ashamed. I promise that in college, I SHALL REFRAIN from the G word.

PROM UPDATE:
Popo is still dateless. -_- so sads, this is sooo ridiculous.

sigh

i hate boys.
f UUUUU seeeee KAYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

hmm music.

i hate it when i listen to songs that i can totally relate to. BUT, the sad part is....that: I could, past tense, I could relate to it. I have so many songs to dedicate to friends, but usually about how we used to be, not how we are now. Am I still stuck in the past, or am I just being reflective?
nevertheless, check out:
those lips-aj rafael
i just want you-aj rafael
showstopper-aj rafael
these are really cute songs :)

things to do for the rest of the month

Spring break is pretty much over. I am very sad because there shall be no more late night convos and all day movie marathons. I wish I could have hung out with ma friends more during my week off, but the break from "society" was pretty great.

Though some personality tests say that I'm extroverted, I am sooooo not. I love my "breaks" and sometimes "socializing" gets really exhausting. As the days keep slipping by, I hope that I at least try harder to make time to relax and have fun with friends. Its soo sad that after this summer, I'm only going to hang out with most of my close friends like 3 times a year.
Anywhoo...
I need to
1. get my UOP wait list materials put together
2. get RELAY stuff going
3. get club stuff going
4. Study lots for AP's...????SHieeet, i haven't done anything all break.
5. starting making prawgress?? for the sake of getting a date to prom?

prom is soo overrated, but i hope someone decides to ask me. If no one asks me, im gonna go to my cousins graduation instead.
Yey me, i have soo much to look forward to -_-.

now...i must procede to hw. fawwwwwwwwk, soooooooo MUCH to do and sooooo little motivation. I hope im not gonna be restless like this forever, or else i'm screwed.

sillyness

Hahaha, this pretty much sums up my life.

half animal-half girl.

I just realized that I have little over 2 months of school left.

I CAN'T WAIT.

I want to intern somewhere or volunteer at a aquarium in crystal cove.

I want to ride a beach cruiser with a basket in the front to the beach all summer.

I want to go to on a fun senior trip.

I want to jump off a very short waterfall.

I want to TRAVEL.

These are seriously ASsss IF I could.

i would if i could. No moneys, No permission, NO GO!

:)

popo feels very content. i love writing good letters and suprising people.

with all this unproductiveness, i have accomplished one thing :) im uberrr happy!

the lunch

I guess this blog is used for only one purpose. It's my outlet to write about my feelings about boys or a boy... if you haven't noticed already. I use my diary otherwise to express myself. To be honest, I'm not such a big fan of blogging because everyone can read it...and I find myself censoring my thoughts half of the time.

Anyways, I shall find more things to blog about as life gets hopefully more interesting.
Ohkays, last week when I was in the middle of writing a blog post about how much I hated how he wasn't talking to me for the longest time...He imed me! I was soo shocked because I had been praying for him to man up and be the one to break the silence...and he did. But to my dissapointment, our conversations were really lacking in the former "deepness" it had been like before. I felt stifled because I had no idea how to talk to him in a friendly manner without making it seem like i was flirting with him. Everything was soo fake and surfacey..you know, like "how r u", "watsup" type convos. SOOO BORING. By the end of the conversation, I was saying weird things again...and just decided its best if I just sign off from aim before I embarassed myself further. So during our convo, I asked if he wanted to have lunch sometime during our spring break and we decided to eat at Islands on Tuesday (today).

I was very anxious to see him, and Idk...wanted to catch up a lot. I also planned a while back to send him my senior column and attach a birthday card along with it for his bday. So since i was seeing today, I decided to sneak it in the front drawer thing of his car.

Description of our lunch:
He picked me up at Mcdonalds and drove me to Islands. When I saw his crippled right hand, i was like "omg...", but otherwise he looked pretty much the same. His hair wasn't gelled or fixed up or anything. The car ride wasn't awkward at all...lunch wasn't either.

We talked about our futures, and about stuffs...deep stuff but Idk, its not the same. In many ways, i was very dissapointed because I missed how we used to talk. I guess when you don't like the person anymore..the spark is gone and like everything seems sooo bland.
He was telling me how he liked this one girl...and i was like I CAN GUESS...the half asian half white girl. I Was CORRECT. I knewwwwwww it!!!!
He also claims that the 'thumb (dumb) video girl" doesn't like him, they are just BEST FRIENDS.
BULL SHIETTTT, didn't he learn his lesson already from his previous best girl friend who really liked him though he was still with me. Ugh, boys are seriously freakin stupid.
Soooooo dissapointing. He also claims that he's a ladies man now, with a lot of cool girl friends. I don't know how to feel about this.

He asked me if I was looking for a boyfriend or anything..and of course im not. Im gonna go to college and my future boyfriend will look for me, not the other way around. I know this is fanciful thinking, but I just need more time until I'm ready to commit. I'm seriously becoming a satist when it comes to love...but o wells, i guess its good until im ready to get into another relationship.

Which leads me into my next topic of discussion:
What my TYPE of guy is:
Physical:
1. cute
2. sporty
3. taller than me by at least 4 inches
4. doesn't hurt if he's a little tan
5. good body (works out)

Personality:
1. nice/ sweet
2. gentleman: open doors and wat not
3. understanding
4. patient
5. respectful
6. funny
7. family oriented
8. motivated
9. sentimental
10. considerate
11. modest
12. knows me and wat I like well


Talents:
1. good at a sport
2. good at singing
3. good at guitar
4. good at writing
5. good at being able to have deep convos
6. good at showing that he cares
7. good at the little things...that make me happy


CANNOT STAND this TYPE of guy:
- guys who think that they are the shit
- guys who think that they can get any girl
- guys who are jerks
- guys who think that they can buy love
- guys who cannot stop being immature
- guys who are not intiative
- guys who don't fall in the category of being a gentleman...i like chivalry
- guys who are little boys...not "man" enough
- guys who are stupid
- guys who are very flirty
- guys who have a lot of close girl friends
- guys who are lazy

HAHA....better luck this month ( im crossing my fingers)